Monday, April 23, 2012


So I'm sitting here in the computer lab printing out the latest entry in a seemingly never ending stream of French homework assignments when it strikes me the oddity of the culture surrounding language. I mean, why the fuck do we even have different languages anymore? Beyond the idea of nationality and pride, I don't think that it is necessary to have the world cast in the shadow of misinterpretation due to language differences.

Now don't interpret this as me saying that everyone should cave to western influence and just learn English to "make it easier" for the rest of us. That is not it at all. All I am saying through this is that there should be one fucking language everyone knows in addition to their base dialect to allow the world to communicate with each other better. Think of the wars that were created in the past century and how much conflict could have been avoided if the leaders of the world were able to sit down and communicate on a common level.

It is with that that I would like to introduce a new language into the system. I am still debating on the name of this language but it would serve merely as a mediator in international relations. I know all of this sounds fancy and semi-post apocalyptic but just think of the benefits. Imagine a world where once conflict breaks the leaders could all communicate in a language that every party understands. That old saying of "lost in translation" would be as out of date as Joan Rivers's original face.

Here is what I propose: A committee meets with a copy of the dictionary and painstakingly crafts a new world language. One where the formal language is the only kind and incorporates traditions from all languages of the world. Maybe the new alphabet can incorporate some of the latin letters we use with the characters of the asian dialects. Maybe some of those crazy german words that put a whole thought into a 29 character words serve as the basis for new words. The world is our oyster and we can change it.

So here is my question: if you could create a new universal language, would you? What is the importance of having these different languages? Would the world benefit from us building our own tower of Babel?

Sorry for a more serious post today. Just been on my mind lately. I promise tomorrow's will be more upbeat and fun with loads more swearing. Titties.

Peace out shitfaces.

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