Friday, May 11, 2012

I Am Fucking Pissed Off, Part Two

Ok welcome to part two. Following the post yesterday I took it upon myself to start researching what people think and the arguments that they have against gay marriage so as to better come back with a structured argument. I failed. Not because the points they were making were credible but because everything I found was completely insane. So instead, I decided to take one of the worst examples and show the world exactly what ignorance can do.

Today, on the Huffington Post, a particularly heinous video was posted of a Nebraskan woman, Jane Skrovota, who took it upon herself to give a “scientific” examination on gay culture. What resulted was a five minute hate rant that made no logical sense at all. It is my duty as an online blogger to take this insane video and break it down for you. This will get graphic. Be prepared. Let’s begin.

1. Gays are sadistic: So she has a few things in this one. My all-time favorite has to be that by inserting a p-e-n-i-s into an anus causes the intestines to burst, killing the person who is being penetrated. I mean seriously? In what deranged world does this make any sense? She uses this “fact” to say that gay men enjoying having sex with men so they can watch them die in the process. If this were true, about half of my male friends would be dead. Just sayin’.

2. Gays cause genocide in hospitals: This one is pretty awesome because she doesn’t actually say anything as to why she believes this. Instead, she just goes ahead and says it. I would really like to hear why she thinks this cause honestly it doesn’t even make sense for a crazy person.

3. An individual found dead without clothes was “a gay” who was killed by their partner: Skrovota’s logic behind this one is an attack on our dear Whitney Houston. She says that Houston was found naked and dead in a bathtub and that she was obviously gay. Therefore, the only logical reason for her death was that some deranged lesbian killed her while trying to have sex with her. Anyone can say this is total bullshit so I won’t dwell on this one for too long.

4. “Anus licking causes sepsis”: Ok so Skrovota is saying here that going ass to mouth causes sepsis which, if left untreated, kills a person within thirty minutes. Human Centipede aside, I doubt that anyone was killed by a rimjob. Just didn’t happen. Where did she even get this statistic? She is already starting to piss me off more.

5. Gay men molest boys because they “don’t have AIDS yet”: Ok this is really where her strange ramblings go into full blown insanity. He logic is that gay men, afraid of getting AIDS, rape small children so that they can dodge the bullet. First, just because a man is gay DOES NOT mean that he is going to go around raping children and just because a man is a child molester does not mean that he is gay. This is solid fact. Any person who has read a newspaper in the last couple decades could tell you this. The fact that she is saying this on television makes me sad.

6. College students need single rooms to avoid “going gay”: This one is a gem among gems. Having same sex roommates makes you gay. Right? Wrong. Seeing how my roommate freshman year kicked me out regularly in order to bring his girlfriend back to the room I would say that having a homo as a roommate does not mean that you will join the lifestyle. Seeing how most of my readers are college students I would say that you can agree with me.

7. College women are seduced with roofies to “go gay”: Her example for this one is that Hilary Clinton’s lesbian roommate of four years made her gay by slipping her roofies because otherwise she would find it "abhorrent". One: Hilary Clinton is not gay. I mean, she stayed with Bill even after the Monica Lewinski thing. Two: No one I know has ever slipped anyone roofies to convince them to be gay and I know A LOT of queers. That is just ignorance.

8. AIDS is a candida fungus disease: Her logic here is about the same as a math equation. AIDS can kill people. Corpses grow fungus. Therefore AIDS is caused by a fungus. Under the same logic since doing laundry makes the room warm and hot room can lead to dehydration and dehydration can kill. Therefore, NO ONE DO LAUNDRY. It will kill you.

9. Everyone who committed treason by the year 2000 were gays: Not even going to go there. Go on Wikipedia.

10. “A gay” is a behavior, not an identity: Ahh, the good old being gay is a phase argument. Being gay is not a disease. It is not a condition. It is not a behavior. Being gay is something that is caused by genetics. It is something that cannot be changed. Anyone who believes otherwise needs to seriously be talked to.

11. Gays cause children to become, well, basically crazed: Oh sweet Jesus. This lady found something somewhere which says that all children from San Francisco are failing every single class in school and constantly rape each other because they are constantly surrounded by gay people making out. As someone from da bay who is attending a UC I would beg to differ. Where my bay kids at?

12. Bisexuals always become insane: Do I even need to? I mean really? I know plenty of bisexuals living happy healthy bisexual lives and even though some of them can be annoying, as some people often are, none of them are insane. None.

13. Judas was a homo who sabotaged Jesus’s "kind ideas": This is when her religion really came out in full force. Judas, the man who turned in Jesus, was apparently a giant homo and turned Jesus in just for the hell of it. Was it because he was sadistic? Maybe it was because of the sepsis. Either way whatever version of the bible this woman owns really needs a new translation.

Ok so I would like to start off by saying sorry this one is so long. I just didn’t have a choice in the matter. There was too much here. Bear in mind, this was a five minute video. I hope something here resonated in you. Please do not let this kind of ignorance continue. If you know someone who believes any one of these things, do the world a favor and educate them. Sit them down, listen to what they have to say and then calmly present them the facts. It will do everyone a massive favor.

Question of the day: So the question of the day involves you watching the real video (link below) and then responding to it. What was your favorite part? What made you the angriest? How long did it take before you started only watching the guy behind her? Let me know.

Ok, time to get this thing up and go to class.

Peace out shitfaces.

Link to the video: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/11/nebraska-woman-homophobia-rant-video_n_1509580.html?ref=fb&src=sp&mimi=1&comm_ref=false

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